I've been in high school for about 3 months, and for the most part, it has been good. Last week was the best week of my life. I've known since middle school that in the high school, their is a dance called the Winter Ball, which is the only dance the freshman and sophomores get to go to. I was always dreaming about who I would take with me to the ball, and one face that would pop into my mind is a guy who was my best guy friend who I've known since 4th grade, Justin. Two weeks ago, I was freaking out all week, wondering how to ask him to the ball and chickened out each time I thought I got the courage to ask him.
Finally, my friend intervened on Monday of last week, and did it for me. Thankfully, he said yes. We've been dating since then. All my friends know and love to tease me about it. My parents, however, don't know. I am scared to tell them, since I am their little girl and this is my first boyfriend. Hopefully soon I will gain the courage to tell them.
But then, my life decided to go to hell and turn into a cheesy high school chick flick. I opened my locked on Friday and a folded up piece of paper fell to the ground. Opening it, I thought maybe a friend wrote me a note, or my boyfriend did something romantic for once and wrote me a silly note. Sadly, it was none. It was a note from a secret admirer saying that they have loved me for 2 years and will write me every Thursday to try and make me fall in love with them.
First off, how stupid is that! How can I fall in love with a person I don't even know the identity off?! Second, I have a boyfriend! I showed him the note and he was not happy. He tried to hide it, but I could see in the way his face dropped when he read the note that he was not happy.
I would have been a bit more okay with it if I did not already have an idea of who the Secret Admirer ( who I shall now just state as SA) was. No, I can tell it is a friend of mine who I have known for just about 2 years. You may think that I am being stupid by just assuming it is him, but I know. He asked me out a few weeks prior to the note and I kindly rejected him because I didn't like him in that way and I had a crush on my current boyfriend. Also, it is obvious that my SA is my other guy friend, who I shall just call M, because since the day I got the note, he hasn't spoken to me. At all. Not in the class where he is my only friend, not in the hall where he usually stops by my locker to annoy me. Nothing.
It was worse when I opened my locker today and saw another note. In the note it said that the SA's name started with an 'S', but with my amazing detective skills, I could see that the 'S' was fresher then the rest of the words and beneath the 'S' was the letter 'M'.
It is making me angry, because if it is the person I suspect it to be, then he knows I have a boyfriend and that he makes me really happy. Doesn't he realize that this is really upsetting me at the thought of having to hurt him by saying I don't like him that way and I never will.
It just really hurts and none of my friends understand, they all think it's sweet when it makes me want to cry.
It is a good thing I started this blog, or I might've exploded from keeping this inside me. I'll keep this blog updated on the status of my SA and the notes.
Love,
Kaitlyn
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