Well, I had to spend a night which should've been full of joy fighting back tears. It was the opening night of my schools big play, also the night of my best friends bday party, which made me really sad that i had to miss it. I texted her saying for her to have fun and eat cake for me. Still haven't gotten a response or any kind of good luck from either of my best friends. Both of them knew this was opening night and that this was important to me. Neither of them were there to cheer me on. It hurt a lot and i burst into tears in my bathroom a minute ago. I feel like they don't care....
Sorry, this is the only place i can rant and no one will call me a crybaby or something mean.
Friday, March 8, 2013
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Boyfriend Problems
Well, I'm having boyfriend problems. If you can even call him my 'boyfriend'. I've been dating this guy for about 3 months, and I'm alone in it. It is a completely one sided relationship. Outside of school, he doesn't talk to me. I hate it. He doesn't even compliment me. At the winter ball we went to together, were I felt like I looked like a princess, he didn't say anything about how I looked. Today, I said hi to him in the hall and he waved but didn't smile.
He doesn't know that I go to bed crying some nights because I feel worthless. I feel like he doesn't care. When I was going through a ton of crap in my life, where he only knew a bit of it, he didn't care. I told him my aunt freaking died and he said he's sorry and changed the subject. I didn't even get a hug, which is what I needed. I'm so close to being done. I hide every emotion from him now, scared that he'll see the side of me that's breaking and will still not care. He doesn't know I'm always on edge. I feel worthless when with him. I get he's not romantic, but does it kill him to compliment me?! Just say I look nice or something! Now, I am not trying to fish for compliments, but I'm a girl. I like being told time to time I look nice. I have a very low self esteem, which no one knows about.
I'm so close to just ending the relationship. Give up the 3 years I've been crushing on him. I just want to feel happy again....
I just want a hug, is that to much to ask?
He doesn't know that I go to bed crying some nights because I feel worthless. I feel like he doesn't care. When I was going through a ton of crap in my life, where he only knew a bit of it, he didn't care. I told him my aunt freaking died and he said he's sorry and changed the subject. I didn't even get a hug, which is what I needed. I'm so close to being done. I hide every emotion from him now, scared that he'll see the side of me that's breaking and will still not care. He doesn't know I'm always on edge. I feel worthless when with him. I get he's not romantic, but does it kill him to compliment me?! Just say I look nice or something! Now, I am not trying to fish for compliments, but I'm a girl. I like being told time to time I look nice. I have a very low self esteem, which no one knows about.
I'm so close to just ending the relationship. Give up the 3 years I've been crushing on him. I just want to feel happy again....
I just want a hug, is that to much to ask?
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